Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It - Chris Voss ------------- 3 Stars

While I didn't really think I did a lot of negotiating in life, this book was recommended to me. And, even with an awfully serious title - Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It , the author actually makes the point that much of life is a negotiation. Really, any time you want something, you are taking part in a negotiation. Oh, yeah, and he did negotiate for people's lives a lot,

so he certainly seemed to know his stuff.

I say "he" as, Chris Voss, the author, is an important part of the book. There are many autobiographical parts, and he shares his credentials and experience often to make you feel he's authentic and trustworthy (it definitely worked for me). In addition, the book includes many stories from his negotiations as part of the FBI along with his support of many students on the business side of things. It all works out to make you believe fully in his messaging.

The book has about a dozen chapters and each offers a different suggestion to help you negotiate better. What I found most useful in the book was how much it resonated to my experience and sense of what works best; namely, it's all about connection and empathy. The old view of being a "tough guy" and creating and adversarial and dominating relationship does not work. Throughout the 200+ pages, I really felt like Voss was providing great examples and actually usable suggestions.  

While I have tried a couple of his suggestions, I am finding that they are not as applicable as I would have hoped. While I guess I negotiate multiple times a day, it's so low stakes that the tools he suggested really don't seem to make a difference. I am looking forward to trying some of his strategies in a real negotiation soon.